The Transformational Power of Love

I learned a really powerful method for processing emotions that has changed my life. Once I started to implement it, I find myself using it regularly in my daily experience. This method has helped me so much that I wanted to share it with you. It exemplifies a truth about the power of love and its ability to transform. 

The emotional processing method is a is a three step process and it goes like this: 

Step 1: Identify/locate the emotion 

The first step is to identify what the emotion is that you are feeling when it comes up in the moment and then to locate where that emotion is in your body. You could also locate the sensation in your body first and then identify what the emotion is second. The order is not important when it comes to identifying and locating. What is important is that you put language to the sensation you are experiencing and you feel into your body to feel where the sensation resides in your body. 

Step 2: Witness the emotion 

The second step is to just witness the emotion inside of you. Observe the emotion with neutrality and just let it be there inside of you. Deep breathing helps a lot with this step. Take a couple of deep breaths as you simply observe the emotion that you are feeling. 

This step is so significant because oftentimes we try to avoid uncomfortable emotions by suppressing them, denying them or indulging in them and allowing them to control us. In these cases there is no distance between us and the emotion. We believe that we fundamentally are the emotion and if we don’t like the emotion then we spend a lot of energy trying to avoid it because it feels too close, too real, and too challenging. 

When you are courageous enough to witness the emotion you are accepting it within yourself and you are also creating a distance between yourself and the emotion. This brings a liberation from the energy of what you are experiencing. It goes from “I am angry” to “I am witnessing anger.” 

If you are able to witness an emotion then that means that you are not fundamentally the emotion. You are the one that is able to see the emotion, you aren’t the emotion seen.  

Any emotion or thought is something that comes and goes in your experience. 

You, as the witnesser of all of it, are not coming and going. You are always here.  Emotion and thoughts are clouds that pass by. You are the sky 

Step 3: Embrace the emotion and love it 

The third step is most important in this whole process. After you have witnessed the emotion you then fully embrace the emotion. Take a deep breath and embrace whatever is inside of you with all of your being. Love whatever the emotion is with all of your heart. 

This can feel very counterintuitive and unnatural at first when we are used to resisting the emotions we don’t like but it’s only when we give our emotions space and love that they are able to move and be transformed into something else. When we don’t embrace our emotions we are in a constant state of subtle or overt resistance to them and whatever we resist, persists. 

It is only through acceptance and love that we can truly become free. 

Let's say I have anxiety about an event coming up in my life. If I never give that anxiety space to be and am in constant battle with it the anxiety will just increase and it won’t go away. When I go through this process of locating the anxiety, witnessing it and then embracing it, the anxiety has the ability to be transformed into excitement. I only had anxiety about the event because it mattered to me. Embracing the anxiety allows me to see what the true feeling was behind it. 

If I feel anger and then embrace my anger I give it the chance to be transformed into passion. 

If I feel grief and then embrace my grief I give it the chance to be transformed into creativity. 

If I feel sadness and then I embrace my sadness I give it the chance to be transformed into peace. 

I was surprised at how cathartic it felt when I started embracing my emotions. I spent so many years in resistance to them, which only caused more suffering. I experienced true liberation by realizing that there is an indescribable peace in the midst of fully feeling a challenging emotion. I began to understand what Joseph Campbell meant when he said “every feeling fully felt is bliss.” 

This process gave me such a beautiful experience of the transformational power of love. Love is the most powerful energy in the universe and real transformation can only happen through love. It is only through loving and embracing our emotions, no matter what they are, that we are able to alchemize them into something else. 

Whatever you want to change you first have to love it. 

If you want to change your emotions, you have to love the ones that are there first. 

If you want to change your life you have to love yourself first.

If you want to change the world you have to love the world first. 

For support with emotional processing, self-love and transformation, contact us.